‘The whole world is a narrow bridge, and the point is not to be afraid’

Lots of people in Israel (including some whom I count amongst my closest friends) do not understand my insistence on the necessity of bringing political themes into the work with Ayahuasca. I can only answer that —in the words of my grandmother, Ray Waterman- 'the personal is the political'. I am prepared to drink Ayahuasca with anyone, no matter what race, national identity or creed. Spiritual works with Ayahuasca are not merely about personal insights, they are also about learning how to integrate those insight in day-to-day life. If you are amongst those who don't like the implications and don't want to bear the responsibilities, perhaps you should not drink Ayahuasca. Consciousness does not grow in a vacuum; implicit in the term consciousness is the notion of knowing with others. When we drink ayahuasca, we cannot choose which responsibilities we want to acknowledge. So, in my opinion, it is important to share this new spiritual practice with friends as well as with those with whom we have differences. Until we find the common ground.

Report on the ceremonies of 27th May and 3rd June 2005 in Israel, organized by AOS©

The plan to hold an ayahuasca ceremony in Israel first came to me on the 11-9 of 2001, as some of you may already have heard. This was during an ayahuasca ceremony when an indigenous ayahuasquero began pointing his finger at me and asking what we (Jews/whites?) thought we were doing? I realized that to this mans mind I represented a member of a tribe and could be addressed as such, from which, under the influence of ayahuasca, I came to the realization that I can indeed begin to represent my people, and that I should look for a way to bring the influence of ayahuasca to such questions as the struggle for peace.
    From thereon it became important to me to find ways to communicate the insights gained from ayahuasca to a broader audience, and thus the plan formed to use the ayahuasca ceremony as a platform for this dissemination of ‘ideas’. I mention this background information so that you will understand that our ceremonies were inspired by that night, which left a strong impression on me and gave me the inspiration to work on this plan, and I hope that one day that inspiration and energy will come to all who work for peace and with ayahuasca.
    The owner of the location where we worked, D, who had no idea what we planned to do on the 27th turned out to be sensitive and appreciative of our work and as many of you heard he told us that his own interest in archery, for which purpose he has targets set up in the dessert, is a spiritual thing, and I saw a connection to our achievement of the 27th because I did actually loose an arrow on the 11-9-2001, and I saw that arrow hit its target on the 27th almost four years later.

Selection procedure:

Those of you who are receiving this letter were selected from about 160 applicants who originally responded to our call and Internet site. We selected you on the basis of a variety of qualifications including those named in our contract (agreement.pdf), not using drugs, psychological stability, open attitudes, curiosity etc. That procedure taken care of by myself and M was quite laborious and I wish to acknowledge the cooperation and hard work put in by M, which allowed us to take care of a confusing amount of communication and discuss each persons application, so that we would be sure that in choosing people we would find those whom we can rely on, to form a base group, out of which we may be able to open out to a wider group.
    I would also like to acknowledge the cooperation of those who made it into our final selection. The trust and clarity of communication allowed us to work together closely in an inspired way, without stress and disagreement. That means that each of us has also been given a glimpse of what lies ahead: the possibility of trusting and caring for each other, of being straightforward and reliable. This allowed and inspired me to be flexible and search for the possibility for you to help us, taking on tasks that I could not possibly take care of myself from Holland, and things that would have greatly increased the workload, so that the ceremony would have been entirely M and my responsibility, instead of a cooperative effort. For this opportunity that leads to the proper and cooperative spiritual form I wish to thank all of you!

What did I learn?

The things that I learned were a mixture of seeing the plans come to fruition, and feeling a growing confidence and a total lack of stress and disagreement, which is what I most worried about (after of course worrying about everyone’s safety) This allowed me to participate in the ceremony not as a teacher, but as a student. This may sound strange as I was continually addressing you and running around talking and organizing, but I felt relatively free of the stressful pressure that accompanies ‘teaching’ situations and free to express myself and be heard, which means that I felt able to speak and act from the heart. This is another thing for which I want to acknowledge everyone in the group, because the care, respect and attention allowed all of us to be heard, and the ayahuasca most of all.
    I also want to acknowledge the gracious and attentive help of N who together with me finalized the plans for the schedule of the ceremony, which we kept to almost to the minute. Without N’s help I would have felt very lonely while planning in Holland, but because we were able to get together on a few occasions and look into the idea of bringing Hebrew prayers into the ceremony, I was given a beautiful opportunity to make this connection to Judaism and also look at the ceremony as a thing with a time schedule and a form which can be shaped to fit different occasions. I also greatly appreciated N’s enthusiasm and keeping in touch so that I did not have to worry about whether things were getting done or not.
    I would specially like to acknowledge all the participants for their sharing of their impressions, pain, sorrow, emotions, etc. If any of you have anything you wish to share with the group, both in Ivrit or in English let us have it and we shall put it on the web. The important thing is that through your sharing we are able to improve the ceremony, and also this creates an important space within which transformative healing processes can take place, and as you can see, this even happens when you did not personally feel the ayahuasca! I have always believed that most of what really happens at an ayahuasca ceremony happens in the first five minutes after the ceremony terminates, when you relax and all the pieces begin to fall into place, but many of you will also have noticed that things started to pop up in the days after the ceremony.

On the ayahuasca:

You may have noted that some people felt almost nothing of the ayahuasca except possibly the taste and nauseous in the stomach. This is actually perfectly normal for beginners, however I must say that it surprised me because the people at the table felt it very strongly!
    It is also important to note that many of you had great difficulty swallowing the stuff. I personally feel that this shows a degree of resistance to getting into the ayahuasca: I know it tastes pretty bad, yet if you have the courage and perseverance you just swallow it without paying attention to the taste, or what you think it may do to you, all the complaining and giving attention to this process of ingestion is a waste of time and energy, and perhaps it hides your feelings about really surrendering to the ayahuasca. Remember: when you are on the verge of a true spiritual experience the first thing you will always feel is resistance. Its logical because we human beings don’t like to change, we like to be comfortable, even if the price we pay is to remain miserable!
    The type of ayahuasca that we used consisted of a CO2 extraction of Banisteriopsis Caapi, and a boiled preparation of the root bark of Mimosa Hostilis. For the second ceremony I added the crushed and boiled seeds of Peganum Harmala to the leftovers of the Caapi extract. This increased the power and duration of the MAOi effect considerably. The reason why I normally do not like to use this mixture anymore is because the Peganum remains active much longer than Caapi. This has to do with the chemical composition of the Peganum. Using a longer acting MAOi means that it is more difficult to handle any crisis situation, such as loss of control or depression during or after a ceremony. The benefits are of course that one can stretch the duration of the visions. Many people have complained to me however that Peganum gives them headaches, and so I am committed to using it less.
    I would like to thank E for his cooking that was really great and thoughtful, especially the fruit for the next morning! We all saw the enormous effort you put into getting the food ready and that was very inspiring to see. I am also very happy to see that you got all the support that you needed when you fainted at the end of the ceremony. Kol ha kavod lecha E !
    I would also like to acknowledge Z’s graceful acceptance as master of the toilets and buckets, and especially the quiet way you helped to carry them and clean the buckets, so that we could all remain in the ceremony. Keeping the toilets clean is important, because while vomiting or shitting we can have some very interesting and powerful insights and feeling comfortable is important. Probably some of mankind’s most important discoveries were made on the toilet! While expelling bad energies from our bodies we can learn to use the ayahuasca as a purgative,and during such moments we often get insights into our dark sides, and the things that are bothering us.
    I was also particularly touched by the conversation I had with R after the close of the ceremony. My first impression was that you had not got anything out of the ceremony but then suddenly everything seemed to flow into some sort of great big lesson. I would be very glad to be able to write down what you told me after the ceremony, but maybe you would like to do this yourself R? Anyway thank you.
    I am also very glad for the beautiful and supportive voice of G, and the magnificent radiance of T as she sat at our table. Thank you both for inspiring and supporting us. I would also like to thank Y and M, for their silent but attentive presence and H for your singing which provided a connection to Germany which is also an area in which some spiritual cleaning and re-connecting needs to be done. Thank you!
    Lastly I would like to thank D and Y for having us at your beautiful place and allowing us to perform this ceremony, and also for the care for the lighting. I thank everyone else for all your help and patience especially for putting up with the seating arrangements. I know it was like putting a broomstick up you tochus, but it did the trick didn’t it?

The ceremony on the 3rd of June:

The second ceremony was a very different affair entirely. Firstly I have to say that I left the organization up to G and M, and that I knew from the beginning that we would be improvising a little. This work was less disciplined for a variety of reasons: one being that as I have already mentioned it is really important that if you ever invite a person to participate in such a ceremony you must know how to prepare that person. In other words: if you do not know what this means, don’t do it! If you wish to invite a person to a ceremony that I am organizing, please contact me and I shall prepare a script for the introduction, that way you can do it properly and the person will be properly informed. It is very important because an improper introduction means that a person doesn’t really know what he or she is getting involved in, and any unexpected things might upset them, such as if they are unaware that a contract needs to be signed. It would be a great pity if people thus became disappointed and if that influences the trust and confidence they have in us. As I have already mentioned, the people who lead this ceremony and are taking responsibility have to act with great integrity at all times, meaning not only love and compassion, but also wisdom and thoughtfulness.
    The ayahuasca we used for this second ceremony was a mixture of the ayahuasca used on the 27th as we had to provide more of the MAOi and to do this I used Peganum Harmala, a seed of a plant that grows in Israel, but one that we prefer not to work with because it is very powerful and lasts longer than the Banisteriopsis Caapi. In any case, the MAOi was profoundly much stronger, and so the ceremony was more powerful with regards to the healing and visionary effect of the substance.
    I decided to cut the ceremony short at a certain moment when I felt there would not be any more music or songs from the Israeli participants who were either too powerfully under the influence or tired. This demonstrates the importance of preparing for the ritual, and dieting and being well rested.
    After reaching home M discussed with me about my decision to close the ceremony at that point. I felt nothing more could be gained and that we would profit from being able to go outside and watch the sun coming up, but as I said, the healing power of ayahuasca sometimes begins to set in five minutes after a ceremony has closed, and this is what happened, when one person nearly fainted and other felt a lot of sorrow and pain coming up. I am very happy to see that the care and help did not end when the ceremony closed and each person was able to receive what they needed in the end. I am convinced that closing the ceremony allowed for the sorrow to come up, in a way that it might not have if we had just remained seated silently.
    My only criterion for whether a ceremony was good or bad is whether it was conducted safely and everyone gets back down safely. Whatever happens in between simply needs to be accepted as, well, as what happens! It is the accepting that is the principle allowing us to see the lessons. Nevertheless, I accept the criticism that a ceremony is never truly closed until every participant is safe M. The fact is that one person alone should not be responsible for the singing however, because it means that if a ceremony turns out to be longer than planned it becomes very tiring for that person. I must point out the importance of learning the songs and learning to make music or do healing work as part of your training to assist in the keeping of the ceremony.
    T mentioned an impression she had to me: S appeared to be disrespectful of the ceremony because of his talking and laughter. I was sitting next to him when this occurred and at one point he apologized to me, but he did not really have to explain to me what was going through his head, I could feel that he was not laughing at us, but from the pleasure of finding something beautiful in our singing. This demonstrates and important point: we often impose our own interpretation on events we witness, and that interpretation is often incorrect. This is a big problem during ayahuasca ceremonies, and we have to take care to first look at how we felt when we were witnessing events. If we were feeling uncomfortable, frightened, sad, or happy we color the experience and give it a meaning that it may not necessarily have for somebody else. The only proper way to function within a ceremony of this type is to withhold judgement. This does not mean not judging, it means we stop ourselves from immediate conclusions until we are able to verify, and until we have considered things!
    As I lay down and closed my eyes that morning I had powerful and seemingly endless streams of visions, of beautiful landscapes and flowers bursting in my head. Bursts of color so bright that they could not possibly exist in reality, such as the ‘white light’ spoken of in the Bardo Thodol are a common experience under the influence of DMT, however such bright ‘jewels’ ‘pedras finas’ appear only when the energy is clear and pure. They are a gift of the ayahuasca to balance any suffering that we may have to go through. I heard others walking about and admiring the beautiful landscape and I felt a profound sense of satisfaction and accomplishment, so this second ceremony helped me to close the cycle that began on the 9-11-2001 and also the cycle that began with our ceremony of the 27th.

Future activities:

In order to ensure that this type of ceremony has a future we need to work towards a realistic goal. That goal includes the precautions necessary to ensure that we have the best possible situation in case of legal difficulties. For those of you who have not done so, I really would appreciate it if you would have a good look, and perhaps read what my book “in Defense of the Mind” says on this matter, it can be downloaded for free now, but soon it will hopefully only be available in paperback from Amazon.com (and you will have to buy it!) The download address is: http://www.a-keys.nl/ayahuasca/Defense1.pdf (or instead of Defense1.pdf type downloads to find the doc)
    Legalization and cooperation within the world of ayahuasca and Santo Daime depend on the adoption of some officially recognized organizational form, such as that of a non-profit organization, and the adoption of a charter, such as that presented in my book, which describes the ethical standards with which we approach this type of therapeutic work. Under the auspices of such an organization it will be possible to organize a legal defense of some sort if we ever have to, and to invite cooperation between various organizations and groups working with ayahuasca. It will also be possible to distinguish and unmask those people or groups that work with entheogenic substances in unauthorized and unethical ways.
    Having a legal framework and a democratic body for dealing with matters such as renting space for ceremonies or funding the production of an amount of ayahuasca can further help to reduce the costs and fund valuable projects. Such projects could be the documentation of our work, or the funding and organization of particular courses. In this regard I would just like to interrupt this text with a personal vision, that came to me at the beginning of the year 2002:
    I had just completed a course at Landmark Education (www.landmarkeducation.com) which is a philosophical course designed to enhance your ability to communicate and apply yourself, to clear up misunderstandings and get your life moving wherever you want it to go. The course had a profound effect on me, and also in its combination with what the ayahuasca was teaching me. I discovered however that when I told friends about this course, if they could not find any other reason to object to it, they would say that they didn’t have the money for it. (The course is expensive, a three day course costs approximately 450 Euro)
    In order to allow my friends to do the course I created a fund for them and by the time they completed the course they understood that it was a great lesson and felt ready to fund the course for the next person. I am very enthusiastic about the possibility of repeating this success in Israel. The importance of this course to our spiritual education is invaluable and I would really appreciate it if you would all take the time to seriously consider doing the course, because we shall need people who are able to organize and really apply themselves, communicate powerfully and resolve personal problems, especially because our spiritual work with ayahuasca is bound to bring a lot of personal issues to the surface, the LE course will help you to deal with using such material to powerfully transform your life, and then the world that you live in. Pay attention that I am using the word transformation rather than change, which is what politicians are trying and failing to do!

What now follows is a list of things that needs to be done in order to create the kind of organization we need:

- we need a volunteer or two to find out about organizational forms in Israel. We are looking for a form that is non-profit, like an association or society, and will not be taxable. Any information you find must be specific and detailed.

- once we have decided on the form of that organization we may need to get it registered which possibly requires a notary, and some funding.

- the organization will probably require a staff of about three, to be elected democratically by us, or if only three people are available, tasks will be distributed as each of them wishes, with the understanding that their positions will be up for review within say a year. The tasks will be chairman, treasurer and so on…

- the organization will need a charter: what does the organization do? This will have to be a carefully formulated document that must be decided upon by a workgroup and then presented for consideration amongst members.

- The organization must have a bank account, which we should open as soon as the org. is officially registered. The account should be internet banking enabled. It could possibly be an American express account.

- The organization requires an official website which means we need someone to do a serious professional job of creating a website with CMS (content management system), forum capabilities etc. The website is our calling card and will be responsible for our public face as well, and it will require at least two people, an administrator and a technically capable designer to maintain it. This work is seriously challenging and either we need to pay someone to do it, or we need volunteers who are dedicated and will not stop until the job is done,so don’t volunteer unless you are such a person. Connected to this work we need someone to do the Hebrew translations for the site.

- We need a good logo or emblem. Please confer with me about this.

In order to fund any work that needs to be carried out by third parties I propose that there be a membership system, that requires a yearly contribution of a certain amount. In Holland members who pay for their membership are given a discount for ceremonies, and I propose that this is a good system to begin with. It can always be reviewed later. I propose that the contributions should start at around 200 shekels per person. With 25 to 30 participants that will give us around 6000 shekels to start our bank account and get things rolling. We can also appeal for some donations and funding abroad as the very existence of an Ayahuasca ceremony in Israel is bound to be received with some enthusiasm. This amount is also closer to what we would ideally like the contribution for a ceremony to be.
    The first activities of the new organization should be to plan a new ceremony, which will be our think-tank, where we shall drink Ayahuasca and debate what more needs to be done in future. For those of us who are interested in carrying on the work with Ayahuasca this will be an opportunity to get better acquainted with it, and debate some future plans.
    One such plan that does not directly involve working with Ayahuasca, could be a cooperative effort to have a series of lectures on the work with entheogens, and invite speakers, show films, do all kinds of spiritual activities. I have personally collaborated with Donal Ruane on one such an event (http://headoverheels.org.uk/archive/event-greenangels-050604.html ) and I found it a very exciting time. That event could be used as a fundraiser, and it would be interesting to see whether it can be organized at 24 rupees in Tel-Aviv Jaffo.
    Next we should examine ways of using the organization to create cooperation and forge alliances with other organizations. There is a slight chance that an alliance with Santo Daime will allow people from Santo Daime to come to Israel and support our work, and I am already working on this plan with Paolo Roberto from Rio de Janeiro, who is a member of the United Nations commission on drugs, which is working towards the legalization and decriminalization of drugs, so that Ayahuasca can be re-classified as an entheogen, and possibly used as a way to heal drug addiction!
    This time round we were unfortunate in not having academics and scientists, politicians and all sorts of famous or important people around. It may sound stupid but it is very important that while we proceed with spiritual work, its scientific and social impact be considered and it would be an important breakthrough to get academic people, or people who have some authority to participate and see for themselves the potential that this work has.
    I would like to mention that there are some serious books on the subject of Ayahuasca and related subjects that I recommend to all of you. If and when you really decide to continue on this path you should get acquainted with the scientific and philosophical writing that will give you a good overview of the width and depth of the terrain:

Location:

We need to look closely at the possibilities of finding a suitable location away from prying eyes and with the possibility of working there for as small a contribution as possible preferably for free. Apart from the possibility of working outside on a farm, or a place such as Hetz Bakeshet, I would be very interested in the possibility of finding a place such as a church or synagogue, or a yoga studio close to or in a town. In order to hold small short ceremonies called concentracaos which are usually quiet and meditative it would be great to have such a place.

Native sources of Ayahuasca?

Another important question is whether there are plants that can be used as Ayahuasca analogues in Israel. We know that Peganum Harmala (Harmel or hamda) is used by the Bedouins, and that the wood of some Acacia sorts may contain DMT. This needs to be really well studied, so I am asking for assistance from those interested in pursuing this question all the way, perhaps by visiting botanical institutes and even getting samples tested. Another possibility is to plant Phalaris grass, which grows almost anywhere and is rich in DMT. With a source of DMT readily available we will be much safer and more able to work.

Finally:

I once again invite all of you to add me and M to your MSN and download Skype (www.skype.com) so that we can more easily and cheaply communicate with each other. Also make a mailing group in your e-mail program and add all the e-mail addresses in this letter to it, so that we can mail each other simultaneously.
    I would like to request that you keep very discrete about this ceremony and if you have anyone whom you wish to participate send their e-mails and telephone numbers to me or M, and let us do the introductions. There will be a possibility to learn more about introductions and also about fiscalization (taking care of others during a ritual) later.
    I am particularly interested to know of your experiences and that all of you are well, so please stay in contact so that we can know this, and hopefully send us a letter with your experiences, that we can use for the site.

Yours with love,

Daniel Waterman: huasquero@mac.com